one little word: 2014

Happy New Year!

We didn't watch the ball drop last night. Steve has been working long shifts (to make up for the lovely vacation he got for Christmas last week--totally worth it) which means he's tired from working and I'm tired from single-parenting. (And I've had all three home since school is out! Phew!) So we were happy to turn in early after a simple but yummy dinner at home and some champagne flutes of sparkling cider.

This evening I started two new journals (the Q&A a Day Five Year Journal and the Q&A a Day for Kids, both of which I got for Christmas! Hooray!) which each had the date January 1 written in them. Isn't it a great feeling to start a new year? A fresh beginning. I love it.

And, per tradition, I've been thinking about my one little word for this year! (Steve chose one, too! Isn't that fun?) So I want to go over my plans for 2014. But first, let's look at last year's and how it went.

My word was:

e n g a g e.

I wanted to engage more fully with my life, drop away from the internet a little more, be more involved with my kids, make art, read my scriptures, and get really on top of my health. I was fully motivated through January and February--especially when I found out I was pregnant!--and then in early March, morning sickness hit me. And it hit me hard. I thought that when I got into my second trimester I would feel better, but it seemed that one thing after another kept happening to my little body as I carried our little love, and I just never really caught a break physically, which made it hard to play on the floor with the kids or work really hard on my novel or focus on much more than getting through the day. It felt like a marathon. (I assume. I have never run a marathon. Probably because I think it feels like a long, long pregnancy.)

So, I didn't do that great at engaging. I did, however, try my best. I was fully engaged in my pregnancy, obviously, and I did my best to keep going even when I didn't feel my best. I got dressed nicely most days, which was an accomplishment. :) I participated in celebrations for Match Day with nausea and went to the Dixie Classic Fair 38 weeks pregnant. I edited two Colorworld books. I think I did well considering, and I'm okay that I didn't knock it out of the park. I made a very beautiful, sweet, lovely, snuggly, hungry baby, and that was the most wonderful thing I could have accomplished!

And this year, 2014(!), my word is:

n o u r i s h

I thought of several words I would have enjoyed but this one kept coming back and nudging me like a persistent pup who wants to be petted. And it embodies a lot of the other words I was toying with, anyway. So I picked it.

This year, I want to nourish my relationships, my body, my family, my intellect, and my peace of mind. And, since those are all super general, I'm going to start with these smaller, more individual goals (because small, specific goals are easier to tackle and keep!):

1. Relationships: Call someone (who is not my mom or someone I pay bills to) on the phone, once a week. I have an intense (irrational) fear of phone conversations. I cannot explain it, because I cannot shut up in person, or when I'm writing an email or blogging. As you well know! If you and I talk on the phone--if I answer when you call or call you back when you leave a message, know that (1) I must love you and (2) it freaked me out to do so. Isn't that so funny? I just feel so intrusive when I call someone. So it makes me uncomfortable. Anyway, if you'd like to be my phone buddy and let me practice on you, let me know! I need practice!
   
2. Body: Shoot for half a plate's worth of fruits/veggies at every meal/snack. At my six week postpartum visit for both Grace and Charlie, I was back at my pre-pregnancy weight (I know, so rude of me). While I didn't look the same and could still have stood to be a healthier weight for my height, it was comforting to see that number. I did not see it at my postpartum visit with Juliette. (We are 11 weeks now, and I still haven't seen it.) So I decided to get back to a healthy weight for me, which means losing 20lbs. A big part of this is a diet problem. I tend to reach for sweets when I am stressed or snacky, and I love bread and cheese more than I probably should. So I'm shooting to make hearty fruits and vegetables a regular half-plate portion of every meal. Even breakfast. It's going to take time to figure out a new way of eating, but I think it will make me feel so much healthier! AND I will be feeding Juliette better, too. So, bonus.
   
3. Family: Spend at least thirty minutes intentionally playing with the kids each day. This means I turn off the iPad, step away from the laundry, and just play with them. Engage them in conversation. Be more open to their imaginations (even if it means I have to play house. And be the baby.). Forget about bills and messes and clutter, and just be with them and watch their little minds at work.
   
4. Intellect: Read 4 books a month. This is a lofty goal. I may adjust it later, or change it to a page count (I'm reading Wool right now, and it is long enough to count as two books) but placing this desire on my shoulders will not only (1) get me off the internet and back to reading, but also (2) illustrate to my kids that reading is awesome and computing/internetting is not that important to their Mommy (it needs to be less of a time vacuum for me), (3) expose me to more story ideas, plot structures, characters, and writing styles to further inspire my own writing, (4) relax me, and (5) stimulate the grown-up part of my brain that sometimes gets a little tired or lonely home alone with the kiddos.
   
5. Peace of Mind: Refrain from using non-phone electronics (iPad, computer) until the kids' naptime. I tried this yesterday, just to test it out. It was hard. I noticed that as soon as I got bored my impulse was to reach for my iPad. Just to flip through facebook, check my email, and browse Pinterest. You know. Just get my little internet hit to prevent myself from feeling bored. What?! I resisted, and I was pleased to see how much more time I had in my day. I got a lot more done. I also felt more peaceful, less frantic. It didn't matter if someone new had sent me an email--I coud check it later. It was strange to realize how ADD the internet makes me. Kind of freaky. Instead I found myself daydreaming and planning and thinking creatively to fill in the bored space, rather than filling it with nothing. Which is what facebook/Pinterest can be if you check them more than once a day. So I'm going to keep a notepad where I can write down things I need to do online (in case it suddenly hits me that I need to pay a bill or send an email or check a sale or something). But the mornings are going to be device/internet-free. I may expand this to include most of the kids' waketime. I want to be more present for them. And with myself.

Do you have a word for the year? Or a goal you're going to start chomping away at? I want to hear about it!