![wal[TONS] of Fun](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjmgAgJc9cXsyWa1gDkfLE0vCO9g4KTBaBWy0MCHScMHk9GuVaZDT7_KhR_2WKWyxXrl_dk__uEj2KxJvcNpLxaC-Akp3EKeawAXf5Q482tw8bPfyJhk_EDPXtdbsuz6kl4M6qVMX2Fs2M/s1600-r/BlogHeaderInstagram6.jpg)
Life is full of waiting places. Have you noticed that? When I was pregnant with Charlie I was waiting for the nausea to end. Then I was waiting for him to be born so I could feel better. Then things were busy for a while--new baby, Christmas, STEP study month, and a trip out to see family/bless Charlie/go to Disneyland in April. Steve started rotations right after that, and it has been a little crazy adjusting myself and the kids to the more sporadic schedule he's had. He starts surgery next, which is supposed to be a tough one.
And now things are slowing down, and we're in a sort of slow spot. A waiting place. I feel this incredible urge to DO SOMETHING BIG AND IMPORTANT, but there is nothing big and important that needs to get done right away. The big and important things I am doing right now--raising my children and working on my book (my biggest-whole-life-dream besides marrying Steve forever in the temple and having my sweet little family)--are slow, day-by-day things. I am impatient to start printing out manuscripts, searching for an agent, emailing chapters around, but I don't even have a complete story--much less one polished enough to start sending out. I'm maybe 1/3 of the way done, and the momentum is slow. Painfully slow. Somehow I feel harried and frantic, but like I'm not getting anything done.
Also Charlie is teething, which is sad.
I just keep pushing forward, trying to be productive (and often not doing a very good job). What do you do when you feel like this?
I get pregnant. Im just sayin'...its always an option :)
ReplyDeleteDream. When I am in my waiting place I dream of what it will be like to be out of my waiting place. I know that sounds funny but I think of all the things I will do and look them up online and dream about it happening and gives me hope. I dream about having kids and I dream about having a beautiful home (that I OWN!) and I dream about having a gourmet kitchen where I have all the money in the world to spend on groceries to cook. After that I think about all the things that are kind of like my dreams in the present (being married w/o kids, having a junky stove, renting, having a limited grocery budget) and I realize how much I have compared to so many others and then I feel better. I know that is strange, but dreaming helps me realize how good I have it in reality while still giving me something to look forward to :)
ReplyDelete